April 20, 2005

Now I Know Where Morrigan Gets it From...

I think The Great Omnipotent One may be a bad influence on my kids. Mom and TGOO are down here for Son#2's First Holy Communion which takes place on Saturday.

Within hours of his arriving, the following happened... each with a different child.

First Offense: He refers to Son#2's First Holy Communion as 'The Eating of the Wafer' or 'The Day Son#2 Eats the Wafer', which I think is funny and I laugh at. I have no idea what TGOO said to Son#2 today, but I was in the kitchen cooking dinner and Son#2 comes up to me and says, "Hey, Mom, can I ask for Peanut Butter on my wafer?" I just kept hearing, "Hey, You got Chocolate in my Peanut Butter!" (We have cleard that up. He will NOT be asking Father for Peanut Butter.)

Second Offense: We're at dinner and TGOO is talking about growing up in Alabama and how they had panthers in the swamps and how they could hear the panthers screaming at night as they were sleeping with their windows open. Of course my boys ask, "Big Daddy, why were they screaming?" He looks at me and I quickly say, 'Because they were playing." He says nothing. Son#1 carries on, "Big Daddy, what game were they playing?"

Now... if you remember from The Talk, Big Daddy is the one that lifted his eyebrow at me and replied "Reallllly???" when Son#1 informed him that we had seen donkeys giving each other piggy back rides on the farm. So without missing a beat he says, "They were making baby panthers." This is completely lost on Sons 2 and 3, but not on 1, whose eyes now get real big.

Nice. Nice that it has come up AGAIN. I told Morrigan and she said, "Oh, be so prepared, he may be the one that tells Son#1 that the EasterBunny is not real."

Me: He will not!

Morrigan: Oh yes, my friend. He'll just lead him down that logical path... like I tried to do... until I found out we can't see the Easter Bunny because of some great invisible force field.

Heh. Not good. Hopefully Son#1 won't lose any teeth while TGOO is here...

Third Offense, and in my mind the funniest and worst: Son#3 is talking to him and it goes like this:

Bones: How old are you, Big Daddy?

TGOO: 64.

Bones: How old is Mom.

TGOO: (Pause) 40.

(Sidenote: he and I were both born in September. I notice that he didn't up HIS age, but he sure as hell didn't mind upping mine!)

Bones: How many years have you been married.

TGOO: (Pause and an evil smirk comes over his face): 39 years. 39 years this June. Your Mom will be 40 in September...

AND HE KEEPS SAYING THIS OVER AND OVER! Now, this is totally lost on Bones, who has no idea what the joke is as the kid is only 5, but this has been a running family joke between TGOO and I for 20 years, at least, a continuation of a joke he had with his eldest sister, with regard to her age and how long my grand parents had been married. My folks have been married for 43 years, but he LOVES to tell us they've only been married for whatever the answer is to the equation of "Bou's age -1".

One day Bones is going to get that.

Morrigan agrees with me... he may be a bad influence.

Posted by Boudicca at April 20, 2005 12:06 AM

I'll be the first one to say it:

TGOO should start a blog.

If for no other reason than to embarrass you :-)

Posted by: Harvey at April 20, 2005 08:18 AM

I second Harvey. TGOO sounds a bit like my father mixed with some of my friends. This could lead to some really interesting situations.

Posted by: Contagion at April 20, 2005 08:25 AM

The probability of his blogging is exactly... zero. I think he is content to just create or participate in these situations. My siblings and I have books and books of stories we could write on him.

Posted by: Bou at April 20, 2005 03:13 PM

Great story! Sounds like my family.

Posted by: Jen H at April 20, 2005 06:33 PM

Oh man, TGOO w/a blog is a fun thought all by itself. If he does it to embarass Bou and enlighten the kids well, it'll be funny to us but I'm sure it'll be torture for you.

I say we don't give him any ideas.

Posted by: michele at April 20, 2005 08:06 PM

That's funny.

Posted by: _Jon at April 21, 2005 09:15 AM