June 18, 2005

The Tooth Fairy Part III- The Kids Have the Gouge

My eldest was 6. He had just lost his 3rd tooth and was obsessed with getting it clean. Over and over he would wash it in the bathroom sink.

Over and over I would yell from the kitchen, "Quit playing with that tooth! You're going to drop it down the drain!"

Then... Plink... there it went... down the drain.

He was horrified. I was pissed. I wasn't pissed because he dropped it, but because in his dropping it he was then upset and if he had listened to me... yeah yeah yeah.

So, I decide... to take the sink apart. I call The Great Omnipotent One and it went something like this:

Me: Dad, your grandson dropped his tooth down the drain of the bathroom sink.

TGOO: Really?

Me: Yeah, I'm going to take apart the sink and retrieve it.

TGOO, rather lengthy pause: Hunh. You are?

Me: Yeah. I guess I'll get out the plumber's wrench, turn off the water to the house and take off that elbow. Is there something I should know?

TGOO: Yup. I have rewired a house, fixed roofs, hung drywall, laid down tile... but if it deals with water, I call a plumber. I don't do water.

Me: Uh oh. You don't?

TGOO: Nope. If you take that elbow off, I guaran-damn-tee you, that you won't ever get it on right and then you'll have a perpetual leak and a mess. I say, leave the tooth.

Now, I'm one of those kinds of people that seriously takes advice. I don't blow off my parents when they impart their wisdom, in particular if its from personal experience. I'm all about letting other people make the mistakes that I can learn from. Makes life easier, less complicated, and less stressful.

So with that, I thanked him and hung up the phone.

Taking a deep breath and steeling myself for the conversation with my son and the now obviously forever lost tooth, I walk into the bathroom.

Me: Buddy, I can't get that tooth. We'll have to wait for the tooth fairy. You know, she is the tooth fairy. She's really small, so she can just fly down that drain and get your tooth...

And now, in my nervousness, I'm starting to ramble about how agile the TF is and how this is no problem...

When my son interrupts: Mom, why doesn't she just use her magic wand? Why doesn't she just use it to get the tooth?


What was I thinking? So I quickly said, "Oh! You are right! She will just use her magic wand. Piece.of.cake."

And with that, he bounced out of the bathroom and it was never mentioned again. Problem solved.

Her magic wand. The kids know their stuff.

Posted by Boudicca at June 18, 2005 10:35 PM

What I took from this story...
At least someone listens to their parents, good for you Bou. I was sitting here yelling at my computer screen "NO NO , don't touch the sink, DO NOT touch the sink!!

Posted by: ArmyWifeToddlerMom at June 19, 2005 12:01 AM

Huh? I take the trap off all the time to get dropped stuff, never had a leak afterwards.

And you don't have to shut off the water either.

I'm kind of the same way with plumbing if it involves sweating pipes, simply because I know I'm not good at it (my father-in-law is a soldering savant). Simple stuff like emptying traps or anything involving PVC pipes, I dive right in.

Hell, I've removed my entire toilet because there was a blockage the snake wouldn't break up (turned out a bunch of q-tips had been flushed and gathered at the beginning of the waste pipe like a lattice grate, stopping all the nastiness from flowing... that wasn't pleasant...)

Posted by: Graumagus at June 19, 2005 02:06 AM

We all have our favorite "tooth stories" - this one was outstanding! Good plot; interesting characters; good moral. Nice work, Bou.

Posted by: Indigo at June 19, 2005 09:23 AM

Thank you so much! That just got me out of trouble.I kept the pacifers that I told Tara the fairy had taken away, to make a Little Pony with. I wanted them for sentimental reasons, and she just found them!

That magic wand is a damn useful tool. I quickly hid the pony, and told her the fairy's wand had broken. She'll be back tonight, and I'll hide them in a more secure place :-)

Posted by: Sally at June 19, 2005 11:18 AM

I was thinking myself that it was no big deal to take the elbow off.

Although I was telling the screen not to shut the water off to the house, just make sure the sink isn't turned on and you will be fine.

Posted by: Machelle at June 20, 2005 09:21 AM

You were wise to not take that pipe apart. Around here, those simple actions always blossom into bigger problems! But this is a 76 year old house...

I want a magic wand. This computer room needs some serious cleaning. I just want to wave a magic wand!! Could you send that TF up north? & I'll see if I can work some kind of deal with her...

Posted by: Marie at June 20, 2005 12:01 PM