August 06, 2005

Not Necessarily the Best Of Both Worlds

My husband and I went to see Wedding Crashers last night. I’ll refrain from reviewing it (yes, I laughed) and won’t give away any details of the plot. This is just my typical personal observations on… the actors.

First, it has become apparent to me that I have inherited The Great Omnipotent One’s innate disability in distinguishing between faces… in particular of the Rich and Famous. Actors and actresses to be exact. It has been a family joke for years, the name of an actor or actress coming up and TGOO saying to my Mom, “Oh! I know who he is. He’s the same guy who played in Such and Such a movie.”, rendering my mother speechless and laughing as she retorts, “Ummm, noooo, the guy who played in that movie was short and bald and was missing half his face. This guy was tall, had black hair, and was very good looking.”

Yeah. It’s about that bad.

And I have gotten that wonderful trait, along with my Mom’s most wonderful trait of not being able to think of words… or botching up clichés. And since I have inherited the absolute MOST absurd from BOTH parents, oh no no no, I couldn’t get just one of these, I had to get them BOTH, I think I am officially… the biggest dork of the three offspring.

Case in point.

One quarter into the movie last night, is an actor who plays a minister. I look at my husband and say, “Hey. I know him. He played the Martian guy in My Favorite Martian.”

My husband looks at me and whispers, “No. He.did.not.”

Me, whispering: Are you sure? Because it looks JUST like him.

Better half, whispering: Hunhead, it looks NOTHING like him. He’s a famous actor, but he didn’t play him.

Me: Hmm. Maybe he played in Lost in Space.

BH: No. Watch the movie, hun. You’re way the hell off.

So of course I am determined that I am right, as I always am when it comes to these disagreements about actors and actresses… and yet, I’m ALWAYS wrong. This morning I jump on IMDB with my sister, Morrigan. We’re going through cast and crew and I find that said actor… was NOT in My Favorite Martian… or Lost in Space. He was in Laugh In. And The Blues Brothers. His name is Henry Gibson. Henry is short, has white hair and looks rather elfish to me. Ray Walston of My Favorite Martian was tall and thin and didn’t look elfish. I still see a distinct resemblance, but Morrigan kept saying, “You are so wrong. They look NOTHING alike!”

Same goes for the guy who played in Lost in Space... Jonathon Harris. And I'm obviously way out of the loop as Harris and Walston are... dead.

Heh. OK, more on what I thought of the people in the movie. No links because as I was searching IMDB, they were trying to load all sorts of spyware on my computer and it pissed me off. I ended stopping my writing so I could get rid of all the frickin’ cookies and run my anti-spyware. So if you’re curious, you can look these folks up on your own.

Owen Wilson is a cutie and I don’t know why. Hunh.

Vince Vaughn. Wow. OK, he did make me laugh… in the LAST HALF of the movie. The first half, every time he was near food, in particular wedding cake, I felt myself cringe and close my eyes. He made me want to vomit. Blech.

Christopher Walken… I like him as a character actor, but there is something about his face. He always looks so cool calm and collected, but you wonder what in the hell is going on in his head. Even when he plays a good guy, you wonder what he’s really thinking.

Rebecca De Mornay… we had a discussion about her, that I kind of won. I thought she was younger than my husband did. He thought she was 50. Turns out she’s only 3 years older than I. Then he was saying how she really doesn’t look that great and I was about to agree when I thought… wait… it’s not as if *I* ever inspired pin up posters in my youth. Who in the hell am I to talk? She looks great, folks. She’s a pretty woman.

Dwight Yoakum… he was with Rebecca in my favorite scene, the first one. I didn’t recognize him. Then again, I have issues with faces.

Jane Seymour… she is a beautiful woman. She is 14 years older than I, and if I looked like her now, I’d not be complaining. She’s doing something right. Seriously.

And lastly, Will Farrell (6’4”) has a bit part. He’s one of my favorite comedians, but I just do not find that man attractive at all. Same with Vince Vaughn (6’5”). And I’m wondering… does this have something to do with some offshoot of a Darwin’s theory of Survival of the Fittest? Small women (5’2”) do not find really big men attractive for fear they may get crushed to death? (read between the lines there, dear readers) Or is it just these two actors? Perhaps worthy of some study… but not by me. Happily married and all that stuff.

Posted by Boudicca at August 6, 2005 10:17 PM | TrackBack

Owen Wilson....? shuddering.....

Posted by: ArmyWifeToddlerMom at August 6, 2005 11:31 PM

Seriously, go figure. I think it's something in his aw shucks personality of the characters he plays.

Posted by: Bou at August 6, 2005 11:34 PM

I guess there are some similarities between those three. I knew Walston and Harris were dead, so that would have been easy for me. To me, Henry Gibson will always be the goofy guy from Laugh In; but, I give away my age by saying that. Dwight Yoakum seems to be getting in to acting. He was also in Sling Blade with Billy Bob. I like his music, too. Rebecca DeMornay is hot. I first saw her in Risky Business with Tom Cruise. I knew Will Farrell was pretty tall, but I didn't realize Vince Vaughn was 6'-5".

I guess I'll have to see the movie now that I know who all is in it.

Posted by: Dash at August 6, 2005 11:35 PM

Vince just LOOKS big to me. He's a tall guy. You can tell by how much bigger he is than all the people in the movie. The women look really really small.

Posted by: Bou at August 6, 2005 11:43 PM

Henry Gibson, Ray Walston, Jonathon Harris... now that you mention it, I can see the resemblance you speak of.

Don't know if it's strong enough that I'd mistake one for the other, but I can see why you might.

Posted by: Harvey at August 7, 2005 01:07 AM

Just to make you feel better... I only recognized 3 of the names mentioned. I am horrible with actors and actresses. Good thing we don't talk movies when we get together!

Posted by: vw bug at August 7, 2005 06:47 AM

Who ARE those people? I don't know any of them.

Posted by: TGOO at August 7, 2005 02:40 PM

Jane Seymour.... mmmmmmmm.

Harvey- "Henry Gibson, Ray Walston, Jonathon Harris... now that you mention it, I can see the resemblance you speak of." WTF??? Two dead guys, one living. You must be out yo mind!

Bou- Ain't nothing wrong with being the biggest dork of the offspring. I'm sure they both love you, as much as I love the rest of my family! The dorks! ;)

Posted by: That 1 Guy at August 7, 2005 04:02 PM

I love Christopher Walken... he just seems so cool & distant. Rebecca DeMorney, ugh. Never liked her. And I'll take the other Wilson brother. Luke is a hottie.

Posted by: Jody Halsted at August 8, 2005 11:24 AM

There's a Luke Owen? Must look him up...

TGOO... you know them. You saw Dodgeball! And Risky Business. And you listen to Country. You just don't KNOW you know them. But you do. I evidently have not deteriorated to the point of where you are. Thankfully!

Posted by: Bou at August 8, 2005 11:44 PM