February 04, 2006

Secret Government Weapons

There are days I think if I were to watch myself, it would be like watching a frickin’ cartoon. I had a meeting today, so I wore my favorite skirt, a flouncy feminine skirt with butterflies all over it, and this clingy pink lycra blouse. It’s not the typical of what I wear, but I wore it to a Fashion Show last year and as this meeting I was going to was about this year’s Fashion Show, I wanted to wear something from the boutique doing the fashions to remind everyone of the great clothes they have.

It was raining today. Nasty weather. Complete skirt alert weather and thank God it went clingy instead of crazy! So here I am struggling with my umbrella, the dessert I was tasked to bring, my purse and papers, thinking for sure I looked like a cartoon. No doubt.

But what really hammered it home to me was the frickin’ bra I was wearing.

Yes. I’m still struggling with this damn bra thing. I hate them. I really do. But sometimes I MUST wear them and as I’ve lost weight since my surgery, I’m no longer readily fitting in my underclothes as I once did, so last week I went bra shopping. Painful. Nearly as painful as bathing suit shopping, which is a whole post in itself… the pain of bathing suit shopping.

Finally out of frustration, I just bought one that felt ‘OK’, not giving any regard as to what it really looked like, my thought being, I’m wearing a shirt over it, who cares?

Yeah. Wrong answer.

I wore that awful bra today with that clingy bright pink lycra blouse and thought nothing of it until I was running late, ran past a mirror and out of the corner of my eye saw these roundish missiles that looked like they were ready to explode from my chest!

Holy crap. I did a double take. Looked at the mirror full on thinking they were OK, but upon doing a side view, I truly looked like they were going to launch. Damn bra.

And I didn’t have time to change, so I went that way, consoled by the fact it was all women in attendance.

So let us repicture this, shall we? It’s windy and rainy. My arms are overflowing with food and papers, I’m fighting an umbrella, my skirt is clinging to me as its raining, but I’m still doing an occasional skirt check as its so daggum windy, and my breasts look like they should be part of some government anti-ballistic missile project.

Lovely day. Truly.

No. No pictures.

Posted by Boudicca at February 4, 2006 10:39 PM | TrackBack

Hang in there... We have *all* had that day. And now yours is esentially over -- unless someone took pictures....

Posted by: Richmond at February 4, 2006 11:04 PM

if I had missle "like" breasts....I would sooo take lots of pictures.

in fact my "missle like" breastages would probably have they're own blog....

Posted by: armywifetoddlermom at February 4, 2006 11:18 PM

I mean absolutely no offense, but I suspect the ballistic missle look might have been a real crowd pleaser among the fellers. A Mars and Venus thing, methinks.

Posted by: Jim - PRS at February 5, 2006 04:40 AM

Did you feel like you were in a wet T shirt contest?

Posted by: GUYK at February 5, 2006 08:25 AM

Jim- They were just so... round. Good Grief. The anti-Madonna look.

Guy- Kinda. Wow. It was bad. I felt like people were looking at me saying, "are they real or are they fake?" Or a sign was on my back saying, "She doesn't know how to pick out a bra...."

Richmond- I can only hope every woman has a day like that. You know the whole misery loves company thing!

AWTM- If my breasts really looked like that? Yeah, they'd need their own blog. I'm sure there would be a ton of stories!

Posted by: Bou at February 5, 2006 08:31 AM

Now there's a cartoon I would watch. *G* Have to go with Jim on this one.

Posted by: Laughing Wolf at February 5, 2006 09:05 AM

try a "natori" brand intimate.... they fit like a dream, look great, feel nice.....

My current favorite "brand o brassierre"

Posted by: armywifetoddlermom at February 5, 2006 09:28 AM

AWTM-We need to talk. Geez. There shall be a bra burning this week, for sure.

LW- You say that, but they looked totally fake. They did.

Posted by: Bou at February 5, 2006 11:24 AM

Ok, you answered the known first question (No pictures), so I'll go ahead and post the obligatory follow-up: WHY NOT? ;)

Posted by: Ogre at February 7, 2006 07:53 AM