March 13, 2006

Personal Floatation Devices

I attended an event last night, where the vast majority of women seemed to have had breast implants... obvious breast implants. They were either too round for their age or BIG. Big. Big. Wait. Did I say big? Yes. Big.

Train wreck, I could not quit staring, big.

And they stuck straight out. Perky as perky gets.

No, I was not a strip joint, which makes it even funnier, considering the event I was attending.

Anyway, as I watched woman after woman walk by, chest out, two things ran through my mind:

1) You'll poke your eye out! You'll poke your eye out!


2) If the room had been flooded, most of the women in that room would have survived due to their own personal floatation devices. They would have been able to float chest up until help arrived.

Then again... if the composition of a breast implant is heavier than water, perhaps they would have sunk to the bottom like rocks. I'll never know...

Posted by Boudicca at March 13, 2006 10:38 PM | TrackBack

LMAO. This is funny...

Posted by: vw bug at March 14, 2006 06:25 AM

I'll never understand the mentality that does that. Never.

Posted by: Ogre at March 14, 2006 07:21 AM

Bou, them things have the same "eye catchin'" effect on me, but... even if the "composition of a breast implant is heavier then water", you still got to consider the airhead factor... I'm just sayin', they might go hand in hand.

Sometimes maybe you do have to be smart enough to float.

Posted by: RedNeck at March 14, 2006 05:50 PM

Nah, you can be heavier than water and still survive if your stroke is strong enough.

I'd "Love" for the Mrs. to get breasts that would make her proportional. I'd definitely enjoy them. But I'm not up for the risk and the potential for further surgery down the road. Seen too many bad plastic surgery photos on the net. Besides, the Mrs. will have much less sag than these artifical ladies when we're older.

Posted by: gamongrel at March 14, 2006 06:02 PM

Is it safe to assume that the "event" was not a cake sale at a convent?

Posted by: Jim - PRS at March 15, 2006 05:31 AM

Thank God for medical miracles!

Just think if these things had been around when the Titanic sank, so many more lives could have been saved.

I love this country and our marvelous innovations!


Posted by: P'cola Titan at March 15, 2006 10:42 PM