April 11, 2006

No Hoops For Me... Please.

Although the job itself can suck at times, the men I work with really are great. They continue to crack me up, which makes it all worthwhile.

I, of course, still occasionally hear a, “Wait. Shhh. Bou’s over there. Don’t say that…”, but that is becoming less. Every now and then they say something where I get to laughing so hard I could cry.

They’re happy my peanut butter is back to smoothed out.

The name Skippy has still stuck… at least for Alpha Male.

And today, they realized, how I just truly don’t give a crap about work in the big scheme. When I’m there, I give 200%. But I have kids and if they were to fire me tomorrow, yeah, it would suck, but my ego isn’t involved anymore. They can’t hurt me. I won’t let them.

It started with my getting an e-mail from my Tech Lead, jokingly asking if they had aftercare at our place of work, would I go full time?


I typed back, “Nope. Nice thought though…” (I LOVE my tech lead. He's the best.)

Then I leaned over Mr. Magoo’s cube and said, “I should get major points. Do you have any idea how hard it was not to type ‘F*** No.’?” His reply, “Yeah, you would have lost major points on professionalism for that reply!”

A week ago, a global e-mail went out telling everyone to please send in their updated resume to HR. They were collecting them. God only knows why. All I know is, I saw the e-mail, thought “oh. That doesn’t apply to me.” and hit delete.

Of course. Because that's what do with all global e-mail. Bad habit. It's going to bite me in the butt one day.

I got this e-mail and thought, “Why would they want MY resume? WHO in the HELL would want MY resume?”

There’s nothing to brag on me about. If they’re looking to show contractors what a great employee pool they have, trust me folks, I ain’t the big ticket item. No PhD here. Not even a Masters. No great technical experience in the field anyone can boast about. I didn’t invent anything. I’m not a leading expert on anything work related.

Cleaning up pizza puke out of a white carpet? Maybe. I’m still working on that.

But at work? No.

So imagine my surprise when I got a PERSONAL e-mail from HR saying very politely, “Bou, please do not forget to get your updated resume to HR.”

Phht. I replied nicely, “I’ll try to scrounge it up somewhere… I think I might have one.”

Yes. I sent that. And when I read my reply outloud to my boss and Tech Lead, as I hit "SEND", suddenly my boss was looking for a copy of my resume. Blech.

Why did I send it? Because it’s the frickin’ truth. I had a great resume put together that got me in the golden doors of Company X, and after that, I never updated it. Short sighted me, just always thought I’d work there until I was 65.

And when the current company I work for called me, the job was already mine. I was horrified when my new boss said, “We need you to come in for an interview, bring your resume.”

I did the big Oh shit! I quickly went through 12 years worth of Performance Appraisals, which I had thankfully kept and filed in chronological order, and went through the ‘job descriptions’ of the various jobs, and bulletized them, putting the verbs in the proper tense.

That was my resume.

So now they want that updated? Great. I have one bullet to add. What a waste of time.

And the more I think about it, the more I think I want to see what happens if I don’t get them what they want. Testing the waters. Don't get me wrong, I don't want to stress out my boss, I REALLY REALLY LIKE him. But, what’s going to happen? Are they going to send the HR police down to arrest me? Are they going to fire me? Wait… are they going to say… I can’t have a cube and I have to share a table with someone?

Besides that… adding one more bullet will push it past one page and I don’t feel like reformatting.

And it isn’t that I have bad attitude. Not really. I like the guys I work with. The job is not the best I’ve had, but not the worst either. But I’m just tired of jumping through hoops for people. I’m done. I… just… don’t… care. Not today, anyway.

Posted by Boudicca at April 11, 2006 09:53 PM | TrackBack

It's the bureaucracy. I periodically had to upgrade my resume at IBM. Why? BTSOOM! I wasn't planning on going anywhere. But I did it anyway. The last reason they gave was if there were to be skill rebalancing (my job went away) I would have a resume ready to interview with other divisions. I do not miss my job!

Posted by: Denny at April 11, 2006 10:52 PM

At least they're not making you "apply" for your current job. I've seen that done and it was not pretty.

Posted by: Ogre at April 12, 2006 06:50 AM

Oh man . . . I always test the waters at my job. I'm amazed that I haven't been fired yet. I haven't even been given a serious write up. The pay sucks, most of the management, sucks. I get no respect from most of them (until they need a favor), so I stopped trying.

Now, just imagine if the guys you work with knew that you're a member of the Bad Example Blogfamily (maybe they already do, in which case, why would they still watch what they say around you?)

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