July 29, 2007

Deathly Realizations

I was driving the boys somewhere a couple days ago, when the discussion of my death came about. All these good deep discussions seem to happen in the asexual Mom-mobile. Forget the kitchen with family warmth and all that romanticized version of what family is about.

The big ticket items get brought up for discussion while barreling down I-95 going 75 MPH.


One of them said, “Mom, what happens to us if you and Dad die.”

Me: You go to Mimi and Big Daddy. Well, for the next three years you do. In three years, Big will be 70 and Mim 69, and y’all will be 15, 13, and 11 and it’s a bit much to ask people in their 70s to take on three teenage boys. So at that point, we’ll rethink it and you might go to Aunt Mo and Flam (aka, Mo’s Beau).

One of the three boys: Aunt Mo and Flam?

Me: Yeah, but we have to discuss it. The ghetto is not a good place for y’all to live. But if your Dad and I die, and they get y’all, that house isn’t big enough for them and three teenage boys, so they’d probably have to move anyway. We’ll see.

Silence set in the car for a good solid minute, which means with three boys, it felt like an hour.

One of the boys: So… what happens to the big screen TV if you die?

Me: *blink* Umm… well, it gets sold.

Ringo: It gets sold? Is that what happens to all the stuff in our house?

Me: Yes. The house would sell, there would be something called an Estate Auction, and everything in it would go and you’d go to whoever you’re supposed to go live with.

Another long silence ensued as the boys digested this information.

One of the boys: But… what happens to the entertainment center?

(Side note: it is a beautiful piece of furniture that takes up an entire wall… absolutely gorgeous.)

Me: It would have to go with the house… it’s too big to move anyway.

Ringo: But… but Dad and Uncle D (my husband’s younger brother) BUILT THAT with their own hands!

Me: I know. But it would not go. It would stay at the house.

Mr. T: Wow. Everything would go… the entertainment center…

Me: You know what boys, you all will be so damaged if I die, the last of your concerns is going to be the frickin’ big screen TV or the entertainment center.

Mr. T: Damaged? We’ll be damaged?

Me: YES. I’ll be DEAD!!

And at that point… everyone started to laugh. Go figure.

Posted by Boudicca at July 29, 2007 08:24 PM | TrackBack

Yeah. All Wee One wants to know is how long she's going to have to wait until she gets my jewelry.

Posted by: Christina at July 29, 2007 09:09 PM

holy crap! Your boys crack me up.

Posted by: wRitErsbLock at July 30, 2007 07:37 AM

When I was around 10 or so, I asked mom and dad if I could have the house if they died. Not the stuff in it, just the house. go figure...

Posted by: vw bug at July 30, 2007 07:40 AM

A child's world is pretty narrow. I would've voted for the t.v. over my parents when I was small. Definitely. ;)

Posted by: pam at July 30, 2007 08:29 AM

I recall after WWII, when I was a wee one and toys were scarce, my cousin Rosalind received a beautiful wooden refrigerator, sink and oven with doors that opened. These were large sized so the child could stand and cook in this magnificent play world. No one I knew had ever seen or could afford such a treasure. I asked my mother why Rosalind, who by the way was a year younger, had received such a precious gift? My mother said, "It is nice gift, but remember she has no mother." My thoughts, "who cares? She has all this 'stuff'." Kids go figure...

Posted by: mom at July 30, 2007 10:08 AM

Christina: At least she is waiting until you achieve room temperature. My daughter just "borrows" things. Shoes and jewelry, that is.

Posted by: Peggy U at July 30, 2007 11:30 AM

My three-year-old was devasted Friday because his best (imaginary) friend, Dylan, died. (And yes, the conversation took place barreling down I-20 going 75 MPH.

Saturday, he was happily playing with (imaginary) Dylan again.

But he informed me, oh so seriously, that original Dylan was still dead; this was a new Dylan.

Should I be worried?

Posted by: Jenna at July 30, 2007 12:57 PM

Maybe WE'LL move to Florida...ever think about that???

Seems like that would be the easiest path to solving all those questions.


Posted by: Flam at July 30, 2007 02:01 PM

Flam- You just want that entertainment center! Heh! ;-)

Posted by: Bou at July 30, 2007 04:05 PM

I remember asking my grandma 20 years ago if I could have her microwave when she died.

I don't want it now. I'm surprised the thing still works.

Posted by: Sissy at July 30, 2007 06:02 PM