August 12, 2007

Random Thoughts for Today

Tiger Woods has a nice bod.

That funky green color shirt he wore today in his tournament is icky.

Today’s run SUCKED. I stopped after 15 minutes. I run for my health and if it sucks that bad, I’ll do something else. I’m not in the military. I don’t HAVE TO run.

I switched to the bike. It sucked too… but I stuck it out for 20 before I decided, “DONE!”

Speaking of military… as decent shape as I am in, I could never have made it through boot camp. It is a character flaw if you will… but I know of what I am capable and of what I am not and boot camp is a ‘what I am not’.

As much as I love John le Carré , I have to switch gears when I read him. His use of language and thought is much more complex than most writers and when I read him I must think and pay attention. I can’t fly through his books. I can read James Patterson or Janet Evanovich in a day. I can read 25 pages of le Carré in the same time frame.

Shadow of the Wind by Carlos Luis Zafon is one of my top six favorite books. I fell in love with the characters, and although it has been 2 months since I finished it, I still miss Fermin.

I think it is hopeless in Afghanistan. It depresses me. Although I consider myself a realist, I hope in this case I am a pessimist. The people there, in my opinion, are doomed. At least in my lifetime.

I think some people need a dictator to function. I thank God it is not this country. I love how we live here… even on our worst days, I think this is the best country to live in. It speaks volumes that we don’t violently fight amongst ourselves as the various groups do in other countries.

I think it is hopeless in Africa too. I try not to think of all the things going on over there.

On some days, I think the world is hopeless and I worry for my children incessantly. On other days… I bury my head in the sand and don’t think about it. I think they probably have good drugs for that nowadays, but I’m Ok with how I handle it… for now.

I’m not looking forward to school starting.

I had one butterfly in my garden yesterday.

I witnessed that damn squirrel drink out of my bird bath… hunched over drinking… it was so odd. He didn’t look squirrel like but like some sort of missing link.

Someone I didn’t know well, but cared for very much died last week. The funeral is tomorrow and I cannot go. I wish I could go… missing that funeral is almost messing me up more than missing my grandmother’s. I love her family and want them to know. I need to write them.

Things change so much as your children grow. My eldest had a buddy sleep over last night. At 10:00 they needed a snack… so they ate a big bowl of cereal before they went to bed. That made me laugh.

My eldest slept until 11:30 the other morning. What in the heck is he going to do in two weeks when he has to get up FIVE HOURS EARLIER?!

It’s hotter in other parts of the country than it is here and I’m sorry for them. Heat sucks.

I have been spending too much time reading about the miners. I do that with mining accidents. I don’t know why, but I completely plug in and sit vigil. This one I had a bad feeling about from the get go. My heart hurts for the families… my husband thinks I should not be so pessimistic. I say nothing.

I am sickeningly worried for our space shuttle astronauts too and am hoping that someone has their proverbial shit together. I've worked in the aerospace business a long time... sometimes it works. I can't think of it not working again...

Oh! One of the reasons I had to quit running! I made spare ribs last night and every time I opened the oven, the smell would come rushing to me, encased in a bubble of heat, melting my mascara, making my eyelashes feel crinkly, and burning my face. The heat/smell evidently stuck in my hair as when I ran this morning, I could smell greasy ribs emanating from my hair. It made me sick. Blech. But they were VERY yummy last night!!

I wonder if now that the Chinese are drinking more dairy and eating more foods with dairy, if their breast cancer statistics will increase.

I still have a Meme to do for The Ocean Guy on 8 random facts about me. I’m not sure there are any facts y’all don’t already know. So I’m still thinking…

Bones told me he wants me to get him into acting. Hmmm.

That’s it.

Last entry... I'm glad I write in WORD first. I too frequently accidentally close the blogging window before I hit save. I hate it when that happens...

Posted by Boudicca at August 12, 2007 07:06 PM | TrackBack

That's crazy sad about the funeral. Goodness, my heart really goes out. My friend Mike (the guy on my sidebar) died and was promptly cremated without so much as a memorial service or a word of remembrance. It was really tough, in a craving closure kind of way.

Re: John le Carré,: I have tried three times to get through The Constant Gardener. That book, while wonderfully written, makes my eyes cross.

Re: "I think this is the best country to live in."

Me too. The best!

Posted by: Erica at August 12, 2007 07:33 PM

That no memorial service thing is tough. There are people who insist they want nothing, and whereas I totally get that, the people left behind sometimes need closure in the act of saying nice words about someone... even if there are no ashes or body or anything.

I read The Night Manager last year and am reading The Mission Song this go r-ound. I can really only read one of his a year as it does take me so long to get through.

when I get really angry at the politics in this country I think, "Where would I go? My ancestors came here from another country, i could be an immigrant." and I think and I think and I always come back to, 'No where. We have sucky parts, but this is the best.'

Posted by: Bou at August 12, 2007 07:49 PM

Bou: I have the same problem with Michael Crichton books. I have been trying to get through the first part of State of Fear for forever now. Husband and son have both told me it takes off after a while and then you can't put it down. Haven't been sucked in deeply enough yet. I keep falling asleep.

America is the best place to live bar none. I am sure of this every time I turn on the news or read the paper. I hope some semblance of it is left for my children. The only place that I think even might come close is Australia.

I am sorry to hear about your friend. Do something to memorialize her yourself. Create something or plant something. I think it helps.

Bones sounds like a natural born actor. Humor him!

Posted by: Peggy U at August 12, 2007 10:55 PM

The negative just oozes from you. Replace your I can't with I can. Change each negative thought to a positive one. There is more than one way to look at everything.

The positive can lift your spirits. The only one you have control of is you.

Read some articles on the power of positive thinking.

Did you read Guyk's Sunday school lesson? Very funny.

Have a great day.

Posted by: nickel1942 at August 13, 2007 06:02 AM

Peggy- OH I can get into it, but its a tough go just reading him. I just need to think a bit more. And I'm going to write teh family.

Sweetthing- Yesterday was not a banner day. ;-)

Posted by: Bou at August 13, 2007 07:19 AM

Um, after reading all of your uplifting entries, I think I'll call it a day(it's 8:52 a.m.) and go back to bed!! :-)
I am truly sorry about you missing the funeral, though. I have to go to a visitation tonight and funeral tomorrow for a woman at church who died 16 days after being diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. She was an amazing woman and she treated Kennan and me to a morning at the High just last month! Everyone at church is reeling.

Call me if you want.
Love you.

Posted by: pfb at August 13, 2007 07:55 AM

I'm with you....things seem to suck right now.

But the U.S. of A. is a great place to live....(and I could be an immigrant, grandfather was the first gen born in the USA)

Posted by: Rave at August 13, 2007 09:38 AM

We all go through times when everything seems to suck. Period. Nothing looks hopeful or even possible.

I'm sorry about the funeral - I wish you could have gotten your chance to say goodbye.

On Afghanistan - perhaps today's opinion journal piece might make you feel a bit better...

I'm not Pollyanna - I don't think they'll have smooth sailing and all will be wonderful. I do think they have a chance. It's too easy to let the nay-sayers make us believe the entire world is going straight to hell. I refuse to give in to them - because that's what they're shooting for - our despair. Forget it! I won't let them win with me. Even if I'm the last person standing who says making things better is always doable.

Hang in there - this feeling will pass and things will lighten up soon.

Posted by: Teresa at August 13, 2007 12:54 PM

Teresa- I see what she is saying in her article, but there is much going on there, that will continue to go on for the remainder of my lifetime. In the last 30 years... so much damage has been done, a big thank you to the Russians for starting the demise. I actually have more hope at times for the people of Iraq than i do for the people of Afghanistan. So many of the Afghani educated deep thinkers were murdered. So many of the level headed... and now they are left with abject poverty and illiteracy that is profound. The young people of today don't even know of of a time when there was not oppression. The young women only know their burqa and that to some, has become a comfort zone. I read for hope, but it is just an exceedingly unfortunate situation. Their government, in my mind, has given a whole new meaning to 'organized crime'. So much corruption. But still... the people try. If anything, they are a testament to the human spirit.

Posted by: Bou at August 13, 2007 01:52 PM

"Shadow of the Wind by Carlos Luis Zafon is one of my top six favorite books" good read!

Posted by: mom at August 14, 2007 03:37 PM

There's a trick to getting through "boot camp." I was a plebe three times before I was 19 - at RMA, Culver and the US Naval Academy - I was in NROTC and I went to USAF Officer Candidate School.

Before you go, get in shape. Run 5 miles in 35 minutes. Swim laps. Get a pistol and learn how to use it.

When you get to basic training, keep you mouth shut and stay in the middle of the pack. If you are very smart, or very fast or very anything, don't let them know. There will be someone who is a total loser. Stand next to him and you will be invisible. let them teach you things you already know. Remember, the idea is to get through it.


Posted by: arch at August 15, 2007 04:39 PM