September 19, 2007

An Open Letter to Britney Spears

Dear Britney,

I must say, I’m just as surprised as you that I’m writing you this letter. You see, I am not into Pop Culture at all. I don’t watch TV, I don’t read People magazine, and in general shun the pabulum that the media likes to push down our throats as news. The goings on of the bad blonde girls on the West Coast do nothing for me.

I’d like to say it’s an intellectual thing, but honestly, I find it all just too boring and I have a life I like to lead. I’m not a voyeur, I prefer to live than watch.

However, that said, this latest fiasco on that awards show could not even escape me, no matter how hard I tried to keep that rock over my head. The rock was just not big enough this time, I fear. And as I perused the internet for my news, hunting and pecking as I do to avoid that which does not interest me, over and over pictures of you surfaced.

I will tell you, I did not watch the video. The pictures were enough of a horror show. Or rather, should I say picture, as in singular, as I only saw one.

My horror though, is not of that of the average American's, though, hence my open letter to you on my blog.

You see, Brit, if I can call you Brit, I really don’t care what you do with your life, whether you choose to wear panties or not, if you like having the photographers snap pictures of your hoo hoo, who you do and when, what drugs you do or don’t do, how much you drink, or even that you have so little shame and self respect that you would go on national TV wearing boy shorts and a top.

Oh, why am I tip toeing around this? You went on national TV wearing black sparkly panties and a bra. Wearing the bra could be questionable as it appeared you were falling out of it in the picture I saw.

And before you think I might be jealous of your body after having two children and under 30, whereas I’ve had three and am over 40, I’m sorry, but that’s not it. You see, I work out a lot and quite frankly, other than the stretch marks and the scars from some surgery, my body looks better than yours. Cardio and crunches and not consistently partying with high calorie alcohol really does wonders.

Do I think you’re fat? No, I do not. I think you look like a very average young woman who has had two children. You actually look better than probably 90% of the young woman your age, who have not even had children, if you consider today’s statistics cited on obesity.

You are 26; I had to look that up on the internet. Not even 30 and you’ve already had two babies and close in age at that. I know that stress.

We have something in common, sweetie. We’re both Moms. I know, we are in different phases. You are looking forward to the first time you hear the words, “Mommy, I love you” given with peanut butter and jelly coated kisses, while I’m nearing the words, “Mom, can I have the keys” while I wonder what type of girl he’s kissing.

But I have been in your shoes… the shoes of early motherhood and I know, it’s a tough gig. It truly is enough to drive one to drink.

Ahhhhh… but here is the catch here, girlfriend. Mama to Mama… to be a good Mama… you don’t. This is going to be a tough one for you to swallow, but its time you heard it from a Mom who’s been around the block.

It’s not about you.

It’s about the little people.

You are their mother. They will love you without question. It is the purest form of love you will ever experience in your life. In spite of yourself, they will love you. Unconditional love.

I think it is time you must ask yourself; do you care that your children will know that most of the world has seen your hoo hooo? Do you care that your children will see pictures of you later in life, clad in black glittery panties and a bra two sizes too small?

Does that truly not bother you? Because I think… that it should. Don’t embarrass your kids, Britney. Be a better person and let them be proud of you. Nice girls don’t show their sexual parts in public and good mothers don’t either. Money can’t buy you class, but maybe it can buy you the help you need to see how to be a better Mother.

You’re the only one they’ve got and so far, it looks like you’re blowing it.

The little people deserve better than that.



P.S. I liked the little black sparkly panties and bra… there is no reason to give them up. Just wear them behind closed doors with your lover of the day or under clothes. That’s where they belong.

Posted by Boudicca at September 19, 2007 07:49 PM | TrackBack

That was Just Plain Awesome. Very well said.

I do wish she would come to her senses, as there's something scary in that you seem to care more about her children than she does.

Posted by: Erica at September 19, 2007 08:03 PM

It is funny, as this came up at dinner the other night. My husband said, 'I think America truly wants this young woman to get her act together.' It truly is sad. And I feel so awful for her babies. How in the world are they going to turn out with the life that she leads?

Posted by: Bou at September 19, 2007 08:08 PM

Britney who?

Posted by: Sam at September 19, 2007 09:20 PM

I've stated this before: Before she's 30 she will be posing in Playboy (Hey. Debbie Gibson did it) trying to revive her career which is pretty much over.

Posted by: Denny at September 19, 2007 09:49 PM

I am impressed you knew who Debbie Gibson was but i think you are thinking of is Tiffany.

The singer, who’s best known for touring malls and - yes fellas - for posing for Playboy a few years back, isn’t trying to recapture yesterday’s magic. She’s actually – dare we say – trying to grow as an artist, and with her new album Just Me, the now 35-year-old singer/songwriter has done just that.

Posted by: greg1 at September 19, 2007 10:17 PM

Sadly I think there are far too many mothers like Brit. They like the idea of having babies - but the actual down and dirty work of raising them... oh they didn't count on that!

What they want is a sweet smelling cute baby to cuddle with for a while, then they want to be able to do all the other "fun" things they were doing before.

I have seen that pic you talk about a few times - didn't really stop to look. It's all too depressing. Girls grow up now being told they can "have it all" - sadly it's the kids who take the brunt of that little misconception. What a terrible thing to do to babies. *sigh*

Posted by: Teresa at September 19, 2007 10:39 PM

Very nicely put but she will not listen. She is all into herself, narcissistic, I believe is the word.

Posted by: nickel1942 at September 20, 2007 06:55 AM

Ah, come on now Bou..bloggin' about twits who show their twats gives me sumthin to blog about other than that goat rope in Washington DC

Posted by: GUYK at September 20, 2007 09:07 AM ns!439991EDE5AAC55!324.entry

Double manual trackback, since I got a 500 error trying to do a regular one, and munu thinks "/ c n" without spaces is "questionable content," so there's an extra space in that url that has to be removed manually. Sorry.

Posted by: Rick C at September 20, 2007 09:27 AM

Now tell us what you really think.

Alas, having money and talent (if what Britney has passes for talent these days) does not ensure that you have two brain cells to rub together...or the most rudimentary parenting skills.

And that's just too bad.

Posted by: Elisson at September 20, 2007 09:59 AM

Well said. Not even the men want to see what she's been showing the world lately. At least not the good men. I am surprised she hasn't shown us her smiling coochie peeking out of what she seems to think are appropriate clothes to wear in public. I'll bet that thing looks like two beer cans rolled together and probably smells about the same. Makes me wonder what her parents taught her when she was a kid. Not very much obviously.



Posted by: Assrot at September 20, 2007 10:56 PM

greg1 - Google Debbie Gibson and Playboy. She appeared in the March 2005 edition to coincide with her album Naked. I don't think it helped.

Posted by: Denny at September 21, 2007 12:42 PM

I have seen your name at least a hundred times, yet have never visited your blog. I like how you write and live. I tried to comment on your birthday post, but I guess no more comments are being accepted. What I wanted to tell you is that you are very much like my wife in your not shopping for clothing, and I am very much like your husband. Yes, it is interesting how we hook up. Opposites definitely attract!

Posted by: Bob Agard at September 21, 2007 08:08 PM