October 01, 2009

Save Ringo!

I'm writing this to amuse my Dad. Bonus if others think it is as well...

Ringo was sick last week, if you recall. He had the Swine Flu, or the PC name of H1N1. Overall, it was a non-event for him. Headache, scratchy throat, minor congestion, fatigue for 48 hours, he has had colds that were far worse. Certainly his bout with pneumonia 15 months ago was far far worse.

That Wednesday, his first day of missed school and the day he was diagnosed, he did nothing but sleep and eat vegetables. That appears to be his MO, when he is sick, he eats a lot of salad.

My husband came home from work and said, "I don't want this! I run a business, I can't afford to catch this! Stay out of my space!" which banned him from the couch my husband sits on. That was about it.

Dinner time came, I put it on the table and asked Ringo if he was going to eat. He said no, but slunk into the room and sat down, changing his mind and taking a big plateful of broccoli. That's what he ate... and when he finished, he slunk back to bed.

The next evening, while sitting at the dinner table, Ringo having his appetite back, my husband jokingly said something about Ferris Bueller. He said we should have Saving Ringo signs all over the school with kids with cups taking up a fund. We could start a rumor that he needed a kidney transplant.

Laughing, we did, when out of the mouth of Bones we heard, 'Yeah, well, I told all the kids in my class today that Ringo was in a mini-coma..."


"Mini-coma?" said I. "What in the heck is a mini-coma and NO your brother is not in any sort of coma."

Leaning on his elbow, talking with his fork to punctuate his words, he said thoughtfully, "It's when you sleep all day and then come out to eat vegetables."

We laughed, pointed at my husband and said something like, "Yeah, well, there's your Kidney transplant right there... except Ringo's in a coma instead."

That was Thursday. Ringo has been in school since Monday.

TODAY was the two younger boys' book fair at school. I was asked to be there by Bones. I have no clue why, but he wanted me there.

I walked in and was talking to some of the Moms when one of the Moms I do not know well said to me... "How is... Ringo? Is that his name? How IS he?"

Word had spread that my family was one of the first families to contract the flu. There have been many many questions regarding it due to the fact that the media has made it sound like we were all going to die. As I keep telling people, "So many people in Palm Beach County have it, if it was as bad as they portrayed it, we would have people in the streets shouting, "Bring out your dead..." every morning."

But people WANT to know. How bad is this flu? At least that was what I thought she was getting at. And so I gave her a squenched up face and said, "Non-event. He's had worse colds. Bones had it and I just took Mr. T home with it today."

Still she persisted with a quizzical look, "But Ringo... he is OK?"

Again I shrugged her off, 'Yup...'

She continued, "But... I heard... Charley told me that he is in a coma! I told my husband, 'Those POOR parents! Their SON is in a COMA!""

And with that, the light went off to Bones and his Thursday night declaration that he had told his buddies at school, including Charley, that his older brother was in a mini coma, and according to this mother, 'quarantined'.

This would be quarantined off his father's couch and taking in only vegetables, although her son didn't tell her the part about vegetables... he probably quit listening when he heard 'My brother... coma".


Posted by Boudicca at October 1, 2009 06:03 PM

Oh, yes... That is funny.

Posted by: Jody at October 1, 2009 06:57 PM

Does this trait skip to the third generation down the line? Somewhere my dad's spirit is laughing his a** off.

Posted by: Angus of Lochalin at October 1, 2009 07:31 PM

Jody- Honestly, the ghastly horror in that woman's face was attributed to the fact she was wondering if her kids were going to catch the flu from mine... and end up in comas. Really.

Dad- Well he sure as hell isn't like you or me. And here's another one for you, and yet another reason I need to get him back on his ADHD meds. The kid refuses to THINK. He is completely impulsive. He he LIKES an answer on a test he puts it down.

He was taking a test in Science. It was a test on cells, air, etc. The question was, What makes our air breathable? His answer? He frickin' selected the answer the quiz put as a JOKE. He answered... I sh** you not... Car Exhaust.

I'm going to stroke.

There is no linear thinking. None. He cannot be mine...

Posted by: Bou at October 1, 2009 08:44 PM

I wouldn't have been able to resist saying he was in a vegatative coma :)

Posted by: Graumagus at October 1, 2009 10:31 PM

Heheh- now THAT'S funny. I don't care who you are...

A....and have you tried coffee yet?

Posted by: Rave at October 1, 2009 10:49 PM

OMG!!! I'm sorry, I shouldn't laugh but that's friggin' hilarious. ROFLMAO.

Posted by: Teresa at October 1, 2009 10:56 PM

I can't wait to see his stand-up act in a few years....LOL

Posted by: P'cola Titan at October 1, 2009 11:25 PM

That was just too funny! And of course, the further that rumor spreads, the more inflated it will become. Your boys are hilarious!

Posted by: PeggyU at October 2, 2009 01:22 AM

Non linear thinking is not necessarily a bad thing. I know several people who are now highly successful and amazing people....who would probably have answered your son's quiz the same way. They like messing with you. They are thinking, but they are thinking wayyy beyond the expected.

Don't kill the spark. Avoid the meds.

Posted by: DogsDontPurr at October 2, 2009 02:56 AM

DDP- I tell people all the time he has the potential to be really successful. There is something about that kid. That said, he needs to pass 5th grade!!! We're trying to teach him to think and not be so impulsive. I don't care how he gets the answer, as long as it's the answer that is best. Putting car exhaust... wow. He failed that test. He got TWO out of TEN right due to just picking the answer he liked, as opposed to thinking it through.

That's going to kill him in the end! If we do meds, it'll be the patch this time, something he can tear off and have it out of his system w/in 30 min. His drama teacher likes him med free.

Posted by: bou at October 2, 2009 05:31 AM

Maybe not which answer is best - but wich is right (or correct) . There might be a big difference in what might make an answer that he thinks is the best vs one that is correct. For most people there is no distinction there, but welcome to a world of alternate realities.

Posted by: Web at October 2, 2009 06:21 AM

That was hilerious! Just the laugh I needed today.

Posted by: Quality Weenie at October 2, 2009 09:20 AM

Bou - you're right. You need to get him through school to give him the best chance to succeed in life. We don't live in a world that looks kindly upon those who don't get through school. Occasionally someone does well despite a lack of schooling - but they are few and far between. Far more stories that are not noticed are those who fail over and over again because they never learned how to succeed and couldn't figure it out on their own. *sigh*

It's a difficult road all the way. You are a thoughtful parent not medicating him until he's a zombie. That would never be something you would allow.

If some medication allows him to concentrate and learn what he needs to learn, that makes things easier for the entire family... especially him. His spark will always be there. It's simply a balancing act.

Posted by: Teresa at October 2, 2009 10:42 AM

Web- EXACTLY! I was talking about it at work today with some other engineers, where our reality is black and white and there isn't much alternate thinking, and I heard myself say, "He picked the answer he liked BEST, not the one that WE would think is 'right'". It was the best answer for his personality. It was just not THEIR best answer. He and I are going to have to have a discussion about choosing their answer vs. his answer.

QW- We need Save Ringo cups. My husband and I kept saying, "Anyone? Anyone?"

Teresa- We will do NO meds EVER before we do the zombie route. I just need something to help him focus during the tests. We can get him through the classwork... we just need to curb the impulsivity during test taking. Right now, we're working on talking about it, working through the issues. I'm giving him two quarters... the rest of this one and next... before we start talking about chemical assistance. I just need him to get through 5th grade. I actually think he can make it through Middle School without help. But 5th grade... too much information, too much required, too soon.

Posted by: bou at October 2, 2009 02:28 PM