November 06, 2009

Just Call Me 'Lucy'

(I missed posting so much, keep going. There is a post after this one too...)

Remember I Love Lucy? Remember how she always found herself in the oddest binds?

That would be me. I think my life sometimes is an I Love Lucy episode except it's 2009. I'm the modern day version... minus the red hair. And the comedic flair.

With my son in Parochial High School is a requirement for all parents to do 15 hours of volunteer work. During the summer, I received a phone call from a band parent asking me if I'd run their fundraiser, a Poinsettia Sale.

"Sure!", said I, for how many Poinsettias can 100 kids sell? Really?

Afterall, I've run some serious fundraisers. I help with the school carnival that brings in more cash than I'm comfortable putting on the 'net... suffice it to say I have armed protection at times when I'm at the school carnival. I run the logistics of money and all that may go with it.

I've put on fashion shows at hotels such as the Ritz Carlton. I mean big fashion shows that I coordinated the entire thing... from fashions, to hotel, to food, to seating... all of it. Big. Easily 250 in attendance, sometimes 280.

So? What's a little Poinsettia sale? Besides, it would all be over by 9 December, I'd have my hours in and bada-bing, bada-bang, done.


Keep in mind as well that I've received no binder of history on this... how it's been done in the past. I get bits and pieces here and there, which is fine, but proving to be quite enlightening, to someone completely unfamiliar with, 'the little poinsettia sale'.

I was told I needed to get hold of the nursery and pick up some samples for the front office. I called them and this is pretty much how the conversation went:

Me: We're very excited about this fundraiser. I think it's going to go very well. It's the big talk. Everyone keeps telling me how beautiful your plants are and how the community looks forward to our sale.

Nursery guy: Oh yeah. Well, your Poinsettia fundraiser is the largest Poinsettia fundraiser in all of South Florida.

Me: *blink*

My first thought? F***.

I got to work and said to our assistant, who pretty much has a full time job keeping me in line, "You're not going to frickin' believe this..."

And I finished off the story with, "You know how I pictured that little nursery truck pulling up and dropping off a couple hundred poinsettias? I'm now realizing it's going to be a F*** SEMI. A SEMI full of POINSETTIAS!"

She shook her head and said, "You do this to yourself you know. You do it. I watch it..."

Me: It was supposed to be a little poinsettia fundraiser! This is poinsettia fundraiser on STEROIDS!

Good God.

I was right. I got to school yesterday to hand out my flyers and someone said, "Could you tell the Nursery to drop off the load after school drop off? The semi blocks all the parents dropping off and it's a real mess..."

I think I quit breathing for a minute. It was confirmed...

Add to that I was at my younger boys' school this morning talking to my girlfriend whose kids went to my older boy's school and participated in the fundraiser. It went like this...

Me: You're not going to believe what happened to me. You know that frickin' Poinsettia fundraiser?

GF: *pause* You aren't running that are you?

Me: Right.

GF: Holy crap. Bou. That load comes in a SEMI. You're running it? Bwahahahahahaha...

Crap. Merry Frickin' Christmas... this should be interesting.

She ended it with this classic sentence, "Bwahahahaha... you know what this means? You are doing it for FOUR YEARS!"


Posted by Boudicca at November 6, 2009 05:41 PM

... no way..... saying "yes" one year means you have it for FOUR??....... wow!....... bwhahahahaha!!!!...

Posted by: Eric at November 6, 2009 08:31 PM

YES! Unless of course... my son leaves the school. Then I'm home free. OR! If he quits band! Also... if I really screw it up. I won't have to do it next year if I botch it!

Posted by: Bou at November 6, 2009 09:46 PM

This is hysterical because you are not a plant person. The person at the nursery should have checked the wanted posters first. Stay away from the truck when it arrives. Good luck!

Posted by: sticks at November 7, 2009 04:59 AM

I am still laughing since you told me. Sticks hit it right on... stay away from the live plants. ;-) 4 years... baw hahahahahhaha.. oh that is priceless. At least mine is only for one!

Posted by: vw bug at November 7, 2009 06:52 AM

Holy crap. I hadn't even thought about the fact I'm the frickin' plant killer. I don't have black thumbs. I have black fingers and thumbs. They're doomed...

Funnier still, I took two samples for me, one for my desk at work and one for my husband's work and the one for his work is still here at my home. As if selling a Semi full of Poinsettias isn't enough, I have to sell my own 1000. Right. So I got a call from work on my cell phone from my Tech Lead and he said, "Umm... Bou... would you like us to water this plant?" I think the survival of the plant at work is going to be a group effort...

Posted by: bou at November 7, 2009 10:40 AM

I'd like to point out, if Mr. T and Bones end up going to the same high school as Ringo, then it could be 12 years of this. ;-)

Posted by: Sissy at November 7, 2009 02:15 PM

I feel your pain. When our oldest boy went to a co-op preschool, I found myself on the fundraising committee. That's the last place I should ever be, except that nobody else wanted the job either. Selling fricking candles in the cold in front of the grocery store ... gah! I so totally hated that. I'm never again joining a cooperative anything!

Posted by: PeggyU at November 7, 2009 03:58 PM

LOL! This is one of those cases that my dad calls a "progressive". That means it will likely get worse.

Meanwhile, feel sorry for the students at ITT Technical Services in Everett, Washington. I'll be teaching them physics starting in December.

Posted by: Carl Brannen at November 7, 2009 06:45 PM

I'm with Sissy. You're looking at a lot more than 4 years.

My wife volunteered us to "sponsor" a ski club when my eldest was in middle school. We even did it the year between when our middle child was in Sr Hi and our youngest was still in the separate 6th grade building.

Likely after the first year you will have no problem running this, year after year, until after Bones is out of college. What fun.

Posted by: The Thomas at November 7, 2009 06:52 PM

I'll take one. Can you have it shipped to your spare time?


Posted by: Jerry in Indiana at November 7, 2009 06:52 PM