February 13, 2011

Just Another Manic Monday

More randomness... as I'm feeling a bit scattered this week.

I'm getting old. High school is flying by for my eldest. We received the order forms for class rings last week. They buy them early at his school, which to me makes sense. If you're going to spend the big bucks on a class ring for high school, you might as well wear it as much as you can, because once you get to college, it comes off.

I opened the mailbox the other day and not one speck of mail was for me. It was all for Ringo. From colleges. Odd.

And we're starting to prep for the SATs which he takes next year.

And he's so not emotionally ready for going away to college. He's just... not there. I'd quietly pushing for Junior College, give him some time to mature and figure out what he wants, but everyone goes away and he'll feel like a failure if he stays home.

We'll see how this plays out...

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Bones got his haircut last week and managed to swindle out of me some hair gel. He is the most high maintenance little boy in the world. I swear he is not genetically of me at times.

Except they say he looks like me.

More so, lately.

So here he has this GREAT haircut when he informs us the next morning that he is now going to go to school with a ... fauxhawk.

He came out with his hair all spikey in the middle and I said, "Wow. So do you want colored hair spray for it to be green or blue?"

He looked at me, shook his head and said, "Mom. Please. I don't want to look like an idiot..."

*blink*

Bones hair.jpg

Phew. Good thing...

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Bones had Cotillion on Friday night. Finally, the end of this entire painful process, that he fought us EVERY.STEP.OF.THE.WAY.

With Bones, everything is about whether HE has made the decision or if someone else has. If HE makes it, all is right. If someone is TELLING him what he is going to do, he is the biggest pain in the neck known to man.

Life is all about people telling you what to do. Life is going to be a struggle for him in that sense. And if you think for a minute I let him give me any lip over what I've told him to do... you are so very wrong. I'm absolutely not nice about it.

At all.

Downright ugly, I am.

So the day dance partners were selected we forgot he had Cotillion. So they saved a little girl for him.

For the last two months, we have been told that this little girl is trollish. I think I posted how he said he was afraid of her eyebrows. He made her sound HUGE, big, with one big scary eyebrow.

Mannish.

Controlling.

He hated her... and every step of every dance.

And so this is what we expected.

And this is what we saw:

A little girl about 2 inches taller than him, and maybe 10 pounds heavier, because afterall... Bones... is Bones... for a reason. She had a good grip on him the entire dance, but that's because they were two of the clutsiest kids out there. They were stepping all over each other. She had a hold of his shoulder to try to steer him so they might not actually... you know... KILL each other, in the process of their mangled dancing. She was trying to steer him for safety of them BOTH.

He took it as she was leading all the time, and she may very well have been, but they were so all over the road, someone needed to steer that crazy dancing ship.

As for the eyebrows? She has TWO eyebrows, both light brown. They are very bushy, and highly arched. When she is a woman? She is going to have very pretty eyes. His dance partner will be a force to contend with.

Good grief. When she stepped out on his arm, my husband and I looked at each other, mouths agape and said at the same time, "THAT is the TROLL?"

Only Bones...

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I am understanding now why people think I am small. I've never felt small. But now that I've lost 13% of my body weight, I get it. I feel... small.

I'm not sure that makes sense. But I do feel small.

I hit the high goal this week. People are definitely noticing. I walked into the band room on Friday, not having seen some of these Moms in awhile, and they were stunned. It is noticeable.

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Lastly, there are days, I swear I'm the only sane person in this house. And that says a lot, because y'all have been reading me for a better part of six years and you know... I'm not so much.

Just the things that happen around me... seriously, I'm puzzled at times.

Bones going to an Art school, they're all about these crazy projects. The last one was building a replica of the Sphinx.

My husband is very arty. He uses that in his profession. He also thinks very LARGE. Between he and Bones when they get into these projects... these projects just take on a life of their own.

I have to walk away.

This latest one is building a scene from the Trojan War. Bones wants a Trojan horse. The planning of said project started today.

I've kept my mouth shut, knowing I'll act as referee between the two warring factions in time as my husband attempts to assist Bones in making Bones' vision a reality.

Now I'm thinking... small scale. I'm thinking, grab the lid of a pizza box for a base of the village, throw a couple houses down, make a horse out of toilet paper tube, make some grass and have some cows, make it a night scene so there aren't people involved, and press on.

I realized at supper today, that the horse had taken on a life of its own. The horse, in their mind, was going to be about a foot long.

Folks... they were going to build a ONE FOOT Trojan Horse as part of this project.

Now think linearly as to what else has to come, sizes of buildings, farm animals, the rest of the lay out of the village.

And that's when the 'tiff' ensued between my husband and I, in the kitchen during clean up, and I heard myself blurt, very loudly, "ARE YOU... INSANE?!!"

He just stood there speechless.

The horse is now toilet paper tube sized and the village is small.

There are times... when I swear to God they are flinging into space... the whole lot of them... and my job as Mom is to grab hold of them before they fling off onto Pluto, and bring them back down to Earth.

Big Ideas. All three of them. Big. God help me.

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Oh, on one FINAL funny, note, my father has traced my paternal grandmother's family back to Aeneas. The way this works, is if you can trace yourself back to some British King, like Brutus in our case, they have this stuff traced all the way back to practically Christ.

I found it kind of funny that he brought it up this morning while we were skyping, and Bones is working on the Trojan war. Funnier still, the link to my boys and the Greeks is not through their Italian father, but through their Scottish Great Grandmother.

Anyway, at one point, we were joking he could get us back to Noah, as in 'build an ark and fill it full of animals' Noah. (There is a conflict as to whom Brutus was actually descended. It is written he could be descended of Ham, son of Noah.) My Mom had this great idea that there could be a Noah Lineage Society where you wore an ark pin and for every ancestor you could trace back to Noah, you could add an animal.

Maybe you have to be in the lineage socities to get the full effect, but I've been laughing about it all day. Whatever.

It's kind of cool. My folks are always unraveling something. Two years ago it was Mayflower for my Mom, last year Jamestowne for my Dad. This year some Trojan hero. Moses has got to be in there somewhere...


Posted by Boudicca at February 13, 2011 10:22 PM
Comments

I love your Bones stories. Just reading them makes the skies bluer, the oceans deeper, and the animals all have weird personalities.
Saw one of my middle school "trolls" a few years back. She could have made a supermodel weep for shame, and had a daughter that will be even prettier. I felt like an ass.
As for ancestors, I just bought a book about the civil war written by a distant cousin of mine. We share same grandfather and uncles, he just has to add an extra "great". Neatest thing I've learned so far is that an uncle of mine, but not his, married a girl from the small town where I am now living and restoring an old house. Great historic district and society here, so I'm off to do research of my own. Patterns in life are funny things. Maybe Bones is on to something.

Posted by: K-nine at February 14, 2011 08:43 AM

At the end of the day - are we not all descended from Noah?

Posted by: patti at February 14, 2011 01:11 PM

Bones reminds me of a character in Whoville. If he'd tie up a little spray top knot it would be perfect.

Posted by: mom at February 14, 2011 10:38 PM

I can hardly wait to see the even smaller Bou this summer. Geez! You were already small. How much smaller can you get?

Posted by: Denny at February 15, 2011 09:48 PM