I was informed a couple weeks ago that senior management wants me to brief some even more senior management coming in from a State where it snows. A lot.
That would be HQ.
They want me to brief this enormous project I've been working since May. I told my boss, "No problem. I'll get some slides together, you review them, we're good."
He told me it was going to be a sit down, just a couple of us at a round table. So I put it together this week when I wasn't working on this massive project. I've been working split shift all week. I leave at 3 and go back in at 6 and work until 10.
This morning my boss said, 'I owe you an apology... I lied to you.'
Me: Umm... well, let's see. Remember how you said you got me an extension until 31 January to wrap up that project?
Boss: Yes.
Me: Did you lie?
Boss: No, that was true.
Me: So I'm still not under the gun until 31 December... I truly have until 31 Jan, right?
Boss: Right.
Me: Then nothing else matters.
Boss: So says you who does not know what I did... it appears I was in error. That closed door session with you briefing the big guys on your project? It's an open door presentation with everyone in the building invited.
Me:
Boss:
Me: You're kidding me. As in... 'stand in front of a wall with my slide show for God and Country to see'?
Boss: Yeah.
Me: Hunh. Bonus for me, my topic isn't interesting at all. Nobody is going to want to see it...
Voice from another Cube: Don't count on it...
There was complete silence in the cube farm after that until finally I said, 'Well... absolutely not one person in this company has any clue what I do or what's been going on, so they can ask me whatever they want and I can say whatever I want and not one person is going to know the difference.'
Another Voice from another Cube: Exactly. Dazzle them. We aren't worried.
So there you have it. That's next Friday's gig. I wonder what in the hell they're all going to think when they see me.
I am going to an event tomorrow and was asked to dress as a Roaring 20's Flapper. To get in the part, I had my hair cut circa 1920's. I brought a picture of a Flapper to my hairdresser today and so now my hair is short with short bangs. I have dark smokey black eye make up, cherry red lipstick and 3 foot long pearls to go with the dress.
And that is how my hair will be next week when I do my presentation. Maybe I'll wear the pearls too...
Posted by Boudicca at November 30, 2012 11:44 PMI soooo have to go to work on Friday... but we are suppose to be making a science borito at school... darn it... Pics of the Flapper Lady please!!!
Posted by: vwbug at December 1, 2012 06:28 AMWell, thank goodness you are an intelligent, prepossessing woman totally at ease speaking to large groups.
I'd be terrified.
Posted by: pam at December 1, 2012 08:42 AMYes, pics please!
And you'll do great. Although, I must admit, when you talked about that 20s haircut and then having to razzle-dazzle them...I kind of pictured you dressed like the dancers in this scene:
http://youtu.be/YW3MIixEps4
You'd keep their attention.
Posted by: Mrs. Who at December 1, 2012 11:17 AMGood luck. I think of myself as shy, but have become pretty good at showing off critters and talking about them at the zoo. But put me on a stage in front of a big group and my brain and mouth would both turn to mush.
Posted by: George P at December 1, 2012 02:46 PMTouch the pearls and wave sweetie! It's the secret to all great presentations!
So, you're giving your presentation on Pearl Harbor Day?
OMG YES!!!! The pearls are a must!!! Absolutely. I love it. LOL. I wish I could be there to see it. You'll be excellent.
Posted by: Teresa at December 2, 2012 08:18 PMI am giving my presentation... wearing Pearls... on Pearl Harbor Day. Hmmm. I think I might just have to start a new tradition of wearing Pearls on Pearl Harbor Day...
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